cancer is SO FUNNY!

COWARDLY SUSAN G KOMEN

2012-02-02T00:08:00.000-05:00

I support Planned Parenthood!

HOW "ARE" YOU?

2012-01-22T00:49:00.000-05:00

i'm irritated.

take me shopping. come for a walk. stop by.

thank you.

CANCER IS SO BARBIE!

2012-01-15T02:31:00.000-05:00

Maybe someone is comforted by the "BALD AND BEAUTIFUL BARBIE" campaign but I think the thing that makes a woman look beautiful during chemo is her personal resolve to survive. Not her Barbie eyes on a baldie doll head.

I'm GLAM, I am.

SCAN THE MAN

2011-12-05T00:15:00.000-05:00

IT'S HOLIDAY TIME! I'M GETTING ON A PLANE!
GUESS WHAT I GET TO CHOOSE?

RADIATION!
OR HUMILIATION!

I'm pretty frikkin glad I don't have a poop bag no more.

STUPID, HURTFUL, LAME

2011-11-02T11:59:00.000-04:00

THINGS PEOPLE SAY:

STUPID: my odds of being hit by a bus are 1 in 2 million.
my odds of dying of cancer are 1 in 2.

HURTFUL: there is no "false hope." there is only hope.

it's my book.

NO REFILLS!

2011-10-20T04:00:00.002-04:00

I DON'T NEED THEM

.... do I?

RIDIN' THE WAVE

2011-10-14T02:53:00.001-04:00

FEELIN' GOOD..

YOU?

PLEASE ALLOW 6-8 WEEKS

2011-10-08T18:52:00.000-04:00

FOR DELIVERY

WHAT, ME WORRY?

WHACK-A-MOLE

2011-08-14T09:08:00.001-04:00

HURRY, HURRY, STEP RIGHT UP!

TAKE A CRACK AT THE WHACK-A-MOLE!

yes. we're there.

f* you, cancer. leave my friends alone!

WHY COLON CANCER DOESN'T HAVE A GOOD RIBBON

2011-08-13T01:23:00.000-04:00

there's an official blue ribbon, does someone want to wear a brown ribbon?

WHAT NO BROWN RIBBON?

2011-06-07T11:37:00.000-04:00

yes. yes. and ours?

Dude, where's my cause?

FKKNG NY TIMES!

2011-05-05T03:24:00.002-04:00

THE MUSIC LADY!

2011-04-02T11:01:00.002-04:00

relief on the medical floor:

music releases anxiety, reduces pain, helps deep breathing.

music is healing

Laura Sperling, CMP plays alto flute for patients at Georgetown University Hospital. thank you!

STUPID SURGERY FOR MY STUPID HERNIA

2011-03-22T02:34:00.001-04:00

scared stupid?

a little anxious

MARCH MADNESS

2011-03-15T22:21:00.001-04:00

sweet!

don't blow it!

WALKABOUT

2011-03-02T10:37:00.002-05:00

if i can't be nice,

i should go outside for a walk.

INTRUDERS

2011-02-13T01:00:00.008-05:00

I'M SIGOURNEY WEAVER IN "ALIENS!"

GET AWAY FROM HER YOU BITCH! (LINK TO RIPLEY v ALIEN QUEEN)

SOMETIMES I'M JUST AFRAID

2011-01-21T19:47:00.001-05:00

KEEP YOUR SUNNY SIDE UP!

EVERYBODY HERE HAS CANCER

2011-01-17T12:45:00.018-05:00

I was freaked out the first time I went to the cancer center.
And a guy in line was getting upset.

I'm not the only one.

WHO ARE THOSE GUYS?

2010-12-24T20:12:00.001-05:00

YOU GET TO MEET LOTS OF PEOPLE AT A TEACHING HOSPITAL:

THE SURGEON, A RESIDENT, AN RN, THE NURSE PRACTITIONER, A TALL GUY, TWO GUYS IN THE DOORWAY, AND A MEDICAL STUDENT.

STUPID CANCER!

2010-12-11T00:02:00.001-05:00

LEAVE MY FRIENDS ALONE!

BECAUSE I'M SUPPOSED TO BE

THANK YOU KIM JONG IL

2010-12-07T18:21:00.018-05:00

FOR GIVING ME SOMETHING ELSE TO WORRY ABOUT!

funny: Kim Jong Il looking at things
update: yay! i reached another goal! i outlived kim jong il.

F CANCER

2010-11-18T20:59:00.007-05:00

MY HAT SAYS "FUCK CANCER"

UNLIKE DC, WHERE PEOPLE ARE RESERVED, NEW YORKERS SPEAK UP:

WHAT DOES IT MEAN? AT THE END OF THE DAY

I'M STILL HERE! DOING MY THING, ONE F-BOMB AT A TIME.
CLICK HERE FOR LINK TO BUY A F*CK CANCER HAT

RESPITE: THINK BEAUTIFUL THOUGHTS

2010-11-10T05:15:00.000-05:00

I'M FREE!

BEAUTY MAKES TIME STAND STILL

THE CANCER INDUSTRIAL COMPLEX

2010-11-02T00:51:00.004-04:00

IT'S A MONEY-MAKER

IT'S A MONEY-MAKER.

DOUBLE BLIND

2010-10-26T11:53:00.006-04:00

Clinical trials are research studies involving people. A clinical trial is a way to test a new treatment to prove that it is safe, effective, and possibly better than a standard treatment. The clinical trial may be evaluating a new drug, a new combination of existing treatments, a new approach to radiation therapy or surgery, or a new method of cancer prevention. About Clinical Trials www.cancer.net

A placebo-controlled clinical trial compares a new treatment with a placebo (inactive drug or treatment). Placebo-controlled clinical trials in cancer research are rare, but are used when there is no effective, standard treatment available. Read more about placebos in cancer clinical trials.

I never understood my clinical trial while I was on it. The information was all there in my informed consent. Even though the language was respectful and direct, I was unable to process it.

Participants in clinical trials can play a more active role in their own health care, gain access to new research treatments before they are widely available, and help others by contributing to medical research. Understanding Clinical Trials: clinicaltrials.gov

I'm glad I participated in the trial, even if I don't understand it.

I DID IT!

2010-10-09T14:56:00.001-04:00

I had my colonoscopy. It was so much fun!

Honestly, the sedation was fun, the prep was not fun, the medical team at Georgetown University Hospital are the best, and: my results were great.
Talk to your primary care physician about colon cancer prevention!

here's Jon Stewart's remarks about Katie Couric's colonoscopy on live television:
THE DAILY SHOW WITH JON STEWART: PUBLIC ENEMA

here's Dave Barry's truthful hilarious story about avoiding his colonoscopy:
DAVE BARRY: A JOURNEY INTO MY COLON, AND YOURS

SO FUNNY I FORGOT TO CRY

2010-10-05T15:05:00.002-04:00

DO I HAVE TO CRY?

Giving yourself permission to laugh is as important as giving yourself permission to cry and grieve. That's because humor is an important defense mechanism; it can help people with cancer adjust to the stress of their illness and treatment. Being able to laugh can create a sense of power. By helping you adjust to the reality of your illness, it can give you a renewed sense of control over your life.
--cancer.net

http://www.cancer.net/patient/All+About+Cancer/Cancer.Net+Feature+Articles/Quality+of+Life/Coping+With+Cancer+Through+Humor

RESTLESS, SLEEPLESS, PROWLING

2010-10-01T02:21:00.000-04:00

I'M STILL AWAKE.

PINK LINK FOR THE CURE

2010-09-29T14:15:00.005-04:00

IF THERE'S A BREAST CANCER NASCAR

http://www.facebook.com/NAPAKNOWHOW

COLORECTAL CAN'T BE FAR "BEHIND"

MARCO COLO

2010-09-25T01:26:00.008-04:00

IS IT OKAY TO SAY RECTAL?

IF IT'S OKAY TO SAY BREAST,
MAY I SAY COLORECTAL?

COLON CANCER AWARENESS IS SO FUNNY!

IS IT OKAY TO SAY BOWEL?

WHAT, ME WORRY??

2010-08-22T13:37:00.001-04:00

The fear of recurrence is both normal and reasonable.

It is a common fear expressed by cancer survivors, especially during the first few years your cancer is in remission.

It is important to remember that while you cannot control whether your cancer recurs, you can control how much you let the fear of recurrence impact your life.

---cancer.net

YOU HAVE BEEN DENID

2010-08-20T08:01:00.001-04:00

MY HEALTH PLAN COSTS $1655/MONTH. COPAYS ARE 20%.
MY CHEMO COST $176,000.

WE APPLIED FOR FINANCIAL ASSISTANCE.

WHAT DID I EXPECT? WE HAVE A MORTGAGE AND A CAR.

ANY TAKERS? HOW ABOUT YOU, BOEHNER?

CANCER, AND LOSE WEIGHT

2010-07-23T18:05:00.004-04:00

CANCER FOR WEIGHT LOSS HAS LIMITED APPEAL

PET SCAN:

2010-07-20T04:23:00.002-04:00

I DON'T WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT

2010-07-10T02:18:00.001-04:00

AMY IS ON THE FREE-RANGE LEGUMES DIET

2010-07-01T10:34:00.002-04:00

DRAW!

2010-06-17T00:33:00.003-04:00

thank you Nancy Morgan, Director, Arts & Humanities,

Lombardi Comprehensive Cancer Center,

at Georgetown University Medical Center, Washington, DC

MAD

2010-06-11T01:44:00.001-04:00

HEY:
I WAS CERTAIN I'D LIVE A LONG, LONG TIME.

BUT NOW I JUST DON'T KNOW.

RAGE IS SO EXHAUSTING!

I GUESS I'M OKAY.

I'M STILL HERE!

WHY DID I GET CANCER?

2010-05-30T17:47:00.001-04:00

THERE'S NO CANCER LIKE NO CANCER

2010-05-28T00:20:00.002-04:00

WHAT DOES "NEUROPATHY" FEEL LIKE?

2010-05-22T04:00:00.000-04:00

I DON'T KNOW IF MY RUNNING SHOES FIT, BECAUSE I CAN'T FEEL MY TOES.

Chemotherapy-induced peripheral neuropathy is a set of symptoms or problems caused by damage to peripheral nerves. Peripheral nerves are nerves that control the sensations and movements of our arms and legs. Chemo-induced peripheral neuropathy is caused by the chemotherapy drugs used in cancer treatment.

The most common symptoms are
Pain
Burning
Tingling ("pins and needles" feeling)
Shrinking muscles
Muscle weakness
Trouble using your fingers to pick up or hold things; dropping things
Balance problems
Trouble with tripping or stumbling while walking
Loss of feeling (can be numbness or just less ability to sense pressure, touch, heat, or cold)
More response to pressure or temperature (mostly cold), so that things hurt more than usual

Sometimes the symptoms are short-term. They go away over time after treatment is done. In other cases, it can take up to 2 years for the symptoms to totally go away.

American Cancer Society

neuropathy is SO FUNNY!

2010-05-22T03:00:00.000-04:00

MULTIPLE CHOICE:

2010-05-20T09:00:00.000-04:00

IN DECEMBER 2008 I FELL DOWN.
I FELT CERTAIN THERE WAS SOMETHING VERY WRONG WITH ME.

IN JANUARY 2009. I WENT TO MY DOCTOR, GOT TESTED, AND SAW A SPECIALIST, WHO PUT ME ON ANTIBIOTICS AND A LIQUID DIET.

ON MARCH 30, 2009 I HAD EMERGENCY SURGERY FOR A PERFORATING COLON.

I WAS DIAGNOSED WITH COLON CANCER THAT HAD SPREAD TO MY LIVER. IN THREE MONTHS, I HAD LOST 35 LBS.

HOW DID I FEEL?

A. SICK AS A DOG

B. END OF THE WORLD

C. GOOD!

IT'S GOOD TO HAVE AN OUTLET. THANKYOU BLOGGER.COM

FRAIDY

2010-05-20T07:00:00.000-04:00

i'm invited to talk to a group of palliative care professionals about blogging for health. i'm scared of groups. my brains fall out. i stammer and die when i have to leave a phone message on an answer machine, let alone speak to people who can see me.

PLEASE CONTACT OUR OFFICE TO MAKE PAYMENT ARRANGEMENTS

2010-05-19T18:50:00.009-04:00

I'LL PRAY FOR YOU

2010-05-09T02:17:00.004-04:00

PRAYER:

ATTENTION:

ENERGY:

BLURT!

IT ALL REALLY HELPS.

MY WONDERFUL DENTAL PLAN:

2010-04-23T03:04:00.001-04:00

WTF????

I'M LOSING IT:

WHAT SHOULD I DRAW FOR MY THIRD PANEL?

what do you DO all day?

2010-04-21T01:27:00.000-04:00

i dunno.

"O" NOTHING CARE

2010-04-08T13:51:00.002-04:00

my health plan costs $1655/month and covers 80% of my medical expenses.
one round of chemo costs $16,000.

I hope my doctors and the hospital give me a break.

I refuse to stress out and die!

Let my death panel deal with it, I'm going out.

SHE LOST HER BATTLE WITH CANCER?

2010-03-26T17:50:00.006-04:00

When they say, "she died after losing her battle with cancer," I think they've got it wrong.

I think if you never get cancer again, and die of something else, you WIN.

If you die of cancer, you've FOUGHT IT TO A DRAW. Because guess what suckkka, once you die, the cancer dies too. It's not contagious, it can't jump to the next guy and it can't eat you anymore, so you haven't exactly lost.

Think of fighting Alexander Hamilton in a gun duel. If he kills you, he wins. But if he kills you and you fatally shoot him, you didn't lose your battle with Alexander Hamilton, you fought him to a draw. If you shoot him and he misses, you win and get to die of something else.

In the bigger, global scheme of things, cancer is a beast that still lurks, so you could say that it's winning. But I still think of any and all triumphs v the Beast as a Victories for Our Side.

Now that we have that settled, win, lose or draw in the battle v cancer, there's not much point in keeping score against Death!

WASSUP? THE DOG ATE MY GRANDMOTHER

2010-03-20T20:10:00.000-04:00

hi everybody, i'm still here!

no new cartoons this week because i'm working on publishing my comics as a book.

but i'll post a new one, soon! i promise. no excuses.

WHERE'S MY CENTER?

2010-03-19T10:55:00.001-04:00

BIOETHICS HAIKUS

2010-03-18T09:34:00.001-04:00

ensolvent means souled

when does human life begin

we can not decide

***

one more thing and then

we need to turn to brain death

my teacher said this

VACCINE TRIAL FOR COLON CANCER, FUNNY?

2010-03-15T10:29:00.000-04:00